Dead Man Walking

january 1, i've got a lot of things on my mind
i'm looking at my body through a new spy satellite
try to lift a finger, but I don't think i can make the call
so tell me if i move, 'cause i don't feel anything at all

so carry me...
i'm just a dead man
lying on the carpet
can't find a heartbeat
make me breathe...
i want to be a new man
tired of the old one
out with the old plan

"dead man [carry me]"
-jars of clay-

i remember a song that was a favorite in my church way back in college. it's about renewing our first love to the Lord... of course, there are many songs with the same theme. but there were these lines in the song that speak true of us. even in the life of some believers ... it says something like, "they say you go wiser as you grow older... but all i know is that i've grown colder." [couldnt remember the exact words.]

it's almost the second half of january already, and somehow im only starting to really think of how this new year and new decade is gonna be. the year that was has been a little dramatic and depressing. there had been many ups and downs in the lives of many people, me included. many were affected by the economic distress. and the many calamities that created havocs in the lives of people and the communities they live in. typhoons there. earthquakes here. [i still remember how nasty and tragic was the flood that affected philippine metropolis then followed by another hit in northern provinces.]

then comes new year. and many of us somehow expect the new year to bring new hopes and new dreams. after all, new year is the time when we begin to renew our goals and plans. some like to make new years resolutions. resolutions to do better this time around. to forget all the past behind and press on to what is ahead. set the date to january and everything sets to a new beginning somehow.

but sometimes, things are easier said than done. a week or two passes after january 1 and you realize you're still facing the same struggles... you're still fighting the same battles... your dreams are still barely coming to reality... maybe even still a dead man walking. limping. barely alive. then you're enthusiasm and optimism flactuates like a flickering light.

that is life's reality... for some.

well... for some, life is like an endless paradise... endless parade of blessings and bounty. of living in cloud nine, far above life's uncertainties and difficlties. but there some of us who are still deep in the wilderness. still aiming to at least have a glimpse of an oasis. hopeful that this year will be a little different.

but really, newness of life, renewing of covenant, pursuing of dreams are not determined by the calendar. they are determined by realization that God is the ultimate authority in all of who we are and who we want ourselves to be... it's a continuing process, not just at every start of every year...

still, new year has its perks. it gives us something to look forward to... it's gives us a sense of new beginning... if only as a symbolism. it's like God is telling us, there's always a time to new beginnings... a time to forget what is behind and pressing on to what is ahead...

may this year bring us greater hope and greater faith to believe for something greater... something more divine...

Sleeping Thru A Storm

the waves are crashing down on me
but i know this cannot be the end

i will hold on to the hope that i have
you gave me a promise...

"you gave me a promise"
firelight

Imagine yourself travelling on a bus, boat, train or plane in the middle of a nasty storm. How would you feel? Will you manage to keep calm? Sleep peacefully thru the storm? I bet not. At least not for me.

Well there was a story when Jesus took his disciple to a trip to one of the cities of the Decapolis, to the city Gadara. And while on their way in the Sea of Galilee, there came a great storm that rocked their boat, literally. The disciples were terrified…. Trembling… Freaking out… (Now that sounds a lot like me eh). So they went to Jesus to see what he had to say (or do). Instead they found him asleep. Nice. Their boat was on the brink of sinking, being tossed by big angry waves and their Master was on the stern…Asleep through the storm!

And we know the rest of the story. And we know that Jesus commanded the storm to be still. And they eventually made it to the other side where the Son of Man did his first miracle in the region of Capernaum. By casting out legions of demons from a man who had been possessed by these demons for a long, long time.

When we are set to carry out God’s will in our life, we are most likely to face a fierce storm. Something to stop us from carrying out the Father’s will. Something to discourage us. Paralyze us. Something to infuse fear and doubt. Something to make us backfire our will to obey the Master and advance His Kingdom.

Storms come in various strength and intensity. Some storms can raise havoc and can be totally devastating. Leaving us homeless, hopeless…

The good news is, if we know for certain that it is God who planted that vision, that dream in our hearts… if we know that it is his will that we are about to carry out… Then we know that no matter what storm may come to hinder us, to try us, to intimidate us, to torture us…We can sleep through the storm knowing that God is in control of every situation in the life of the chosen.
We can be still and know that He is God…