The Trying Times

If weakness is a wound that no one wants to speak of
Then "cool" is just how far we have to fall
And I am not immune, I only want to be loved
But I feel safe behind the firewall

Can I lose my need to impress?
If you want the truth I need to confess

I'm not alright,

I'm broken inside
And all I go through

It leads me to You

I'm Not Alright

-Sanctus Real

I cant sleep... Must be the load of caffeine i took earlier at the tea shop. Went out for a breather. So i went to this coffee shop where i often hang-out either alone or with my Muslim buddies. After all, the area is composed of food shops and tea shops owned by Muslims, for the huge muslims populace in the sector. The four coffee shops packed with people as Manchester United was playing and winning. First had cold milk tea... followed by warm coffee as i play with my fone, facebooking. It's my version of getting drunk... haha!

Anyway, so at least i find time to write this blog idea that i have had in my cerebrum for some time. Things have been a little tough lately. A little mentally draining. Sort of... You know, those season when you feel like facing too many life issues... Like, just when you think you have overcome one battle, here comes another. And they come in waves... Intermittent. But for what it's worth, at least it's not constant. We are still given a chance to breathe... a chance to celebrate our victories before another blow comes straight right between our eyes! A time out...

I love telling of God's goodness... the miracles, big and small, that happen everyday. But i am not ashamed to also tell of my sufferings. Struggles. Apparent defeats. For even the apostle Paul, the super-apostle that he was, also mentioned a lot of his earthly sufferings. His thorn in the flesh [though we still wonder what that really was]. His sometimes longing to be with the Lord which, he said, was far better than suffering here on earth.

And then there was mighty King David. His Psalms are full of both declarations of God's mercy and goodness, and also his many sighing... His litany of hardships. Of enemies pursuing him non-stop. And of course there was these heart issues he had to deal with. If these highly favored of God, men of radical faith, werent exempted of sufferings and pain... how are we different?

I know, i know... some of us never really suffer that much. We have good health. We have abundant [or at least, sufficient] provisions. Good family and smart kids. Wonderful friends... We have heaven on earth. Just as God promised to those who would follow and trust him. Some of us dont really know the meaning of the word "suffering" or "trials." Of enemies of the soul... of thorns in the flesh.

But the same God also said that those who follow him will have various trials. Will be persecuted. Be tempted. Jesus told us to be always on guard because the spirit is forever wiling but the flesh is often weak. And while Paul talked about his sufferings and weaknesses, he also affirmed that in his weaknesses God's grace abounds. He experiences God's working power. His deliverance. His miracles.

It's not always easy... We sometimes cry to God for easy way out. For deliverance to come immediately and not prolong the agony. But God knows where he wants us molded. Broken. Strengthened. Sadly, God doesnt take short-cuts. And hopefully, our experience of different difficulties and struggles will enable us to relate to a dying, struggling, broken world. To a world full of lonely and desperate people we will be able to sympathize...

Hopefully. If we allow God to work in us, and through us... These trying times will benefit us. And the world around us.

Amen.

Time to sleep.....